Quite frankly, I have been uninspired to write. It took me awhile to figure out why, but fortunately, last night, I came to some sort of conclusion: I am a young professional in my mid-twenties going through what has been deemed as the "Quarterlife Crisis". There are a few books and articles written on this subject all of which are an attempt at explaining to the world why this phase in human development is significant, endless, exciting, terrifying, inspirational and debilitating. I have been lost for words because I have felt all of these things throughout my Quarterlife Crisis thus far, and through its ups and downs, I have simply not felt inspired to explain my revelations on life. This post below is an excerpt of the words I was unable to find to explain what this "Stage" feels like. Therefore, until the time when I can post a better explanation of the next revelation, ENJOY!
Ages and Stages of Life
From crawling, walking and babbling to
the angst and rebellion of the tween and
teen years, children go through a predictable
set of developmental stages. But
stages aren’t just a kid thing. In fact, every
decade poses its own predictable set of
“normative tasks,” says Dr. Diane Finley, a
developmental psychologist at Prince
George’s Community College in Largo, Md.,
and spokesperson for the American Psychological
Association. That’s psychology
speak for adult milestones.
But this isn’t your mother’s straightforward
life track. In the past, you got married
and had all your kids by your late 20s, spent
your 30s raising them and began seeing
them off to college by the time you hit your
40s, which paved the way for the empty
nest. Now, it’s more of a zigzag. You may be
spending your 20s and 30s laying the
groundwork for your career and not getting
married and starting a family until your
mid-30s or 40s or even later. That timing
can shift your personal course of development
and the life issues you’re dealing with,
so can divorce and the fact that we’re living
Whatever your situation, are you on
track to living your life to the fullest? Take
charge of your fate with this decade-bydecade
guide to maximizing your personal
sense of fulfillment.
Your 20s: The “Who Am I?” Years
Your 20s are a time of self-exploration,
confidence and skill building as you learn
how to exist in the workforce. This decade
is most forgiving because you’re young and
expectations among employers (and your
parents) are lower, especially if you’re supporting
yourself and therefore paying your
own tab. If you get married in your 20s and
have kids right away, you’ll have less leeway
to explore different aspects of your personality
because your life won’t be just about
you anymore. But whether your priorities
are centered around career or family, you
spend your 20s trying to answer the central
question: Who am I?
Have a plan. Your 20s can be an exciting
and tumultuous time, but don’t wing
them entirely. Formulate a basic plan about
what you’d like to accomplish personally
and professionally and where you’d like to
be at the end of the decade. But stay flexible.
“So many people bum themselves out
when they don’t live according to the
timetable they’ve got in their head,” says
Dr. Beth Erickson, a developmental psychologist
in Minnetonka, Minn.
If, for example, you don’t get married at
age 27 like you thought you would because
Mr. Right hasn’t come along yet, don’t panic
or blame yourself.
“There’s a difference between having a
basic plan and trying to control the universe
to meet that plan,” Erickson says.
Keep trying to accomplish your goals or
feel free to change them along the way and
shift your timing, if necessary. Better to do
that than, say, marry Mr. Not Right just because
he came along at the”right” time, or
to ditch Mr. Right just because you didn’t
plan on getting married until your 30s.
Go ahead: Move about the cabin.
While you’re living your plan, feel free to
deviate from it. Your 20s are perfect for trying
out various jobs, cities and partners, so
give yourself permission to test your
“There will never be a better time to experiment
with different life experiences
and discover facets of your personality,” Erickson
In your 20s, it’s okay to quit your smalltown
accounting position or try your hand
at acting in Los Angeles or go to law school.
And if it doesn’t work out, don’t feel bad.
“Lots of things we think of as mistakes in
our 20s really aren’t,” says Erickson.
“They’re just experiences and choices that
didn’t fit us.”
Give yourself points for trying and for the
invaluable lessons you’ll learn about yourself
along the way.
Seek support. If you get married and
have kids in your 20s, “get emotional support
from other moms-to-be,” says Shellie
Fidell, a psychotherapist in private practice
at Women’s Healthcare Partnership in St.
Louis, Mo. Connecting with other moms
online is a great way to get parenting tips,
dissolve the isolation of taking care of a
newborn and feel part of a like-minded
community. Also, get a babysitter at least
once a month so you can forge an identity
as a couple. No matter what your age,
“don’t make your kids the center of your
life,” says Erickson. “It’s not good for you,
your marriage or your children.”