Talking to Our Inner Little BadAss

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When that movie “Inside Out” came out, I walked out of the theatre with my family smiling from ear to ear. “Genius!” My sister screamed, “that was absolutely genius!” I’m not going to lie as much as I loved that movie, I was also a little jealous. I was jealous because years prior, I’m talking a solid 8 years prior to this movie, I had told a friend, when I was living in Spain about the little girl that lives inside my head. I was jealous because I had been meaning to write about this little girl, to tell people about it in some way and I felt like this movie stole the idea from inside my body. Elizabeth Gilbert talks about the power of this in her book “Big Magic” how this is how it works with creative ideas. That if you have a creative idea you need to execute on it, otherwise the idea will travel to someone else and they will execute it. Ideas want to be born, and that’s what happened. Although in truth, my idea was, still is, very different, it was rooted in the same thinking that there were little people inside our heads helping us live our life.  

This little girl that lives inside my head, holds the very important job of managing me. She manages my mind, my thoughts, my emotions, my experiences, my memories, in essence, she manages everything that happens with my mind because that’s her job. She spends her days driving around in my mind on a fork-lift filing away memories, thoughts, emotions, storing different experiences, all with the intention of helping me keep them all straight. If I forget I’ve met someone before, and the name escapes, or I’ve forgotten a key memory, or I just can’t seem to recall an experience, it’s because my little girl either took the day off, was taking a nap, on her lunch break, meditating or maybe had a little too much to drink, which sometimes happens, and the memory was filed in the wrong cabinet, or it fell to the floor {I don’t think it’s all that organized in my head}. I certainly don’t blame my little girl, she has a very exhausting job, managing me and all, and she really is quite good at her job.

Over the years, I’ve built/am building a deeper relationship with her. Everything I experience, she experiences too, and to the tenth degree because it’s her job to help me manage the experience. All the sadness that my body processes, she feels too. When I fight with my beloved, she feels it too. When I’m flourishing and ecstatic about the evolution of my job, she’s up there jumping up and down on her forklift chair. Everything I feel, she feels, and she always has my best interest at heart.

I spoke to her in a meditation session once. I saw her standing there, this time not in my head but in my belly, below my belly button deep in my sacral chakra. She was looking up at me with sad eyes. She wanted a hug. I hugged her, I told her I was listening, she nodded, she doesn’t say much, I do all the talking for us. I told her I know. I promised her I heard her wishes, and then I asked if I could have more time. She empathetically nodded, and we hugged. My body exploded with love in this embrace between us.

In that embrace she reminded me of one simple thing - LISTEN. Listen to my heart, listen to my deepest desires, listen to my body, listen to my emotions, listen to my intuition, listen to my inner little girl. We all have a little person inside of us just waiting to come out, to be discovered, to be listened to. They’re there as our companion, a friend to help us navigate the world, and they just want to be heard.