Building Trust Resilience.

Healing happens in little moments.

For the last 2 years on New Years Eve I’ve chosen a word or a phrase to represent the year ahead. It would be a word that embodied what I was working on that year, and what I was desiring to break through. It would represent what I knew I was capable of and what I would lean on throughout the year for support. The last two years my word has been in the family of TRUST.

As we know, for so many people, this year has been anything but what they desired it would be. And yet for others, it’s been a lot of expansion & soul awakening moments. I’d say for me it’s been a mix of both. Nonetheless, I continuously let my word of the year guide me. TRUST.

Trusting in love and how it would show up for me, for us. Trusting in the steps I was taking towards my dreams in my personal life, and at work. Trusting in the letting go of opportunities that were no longer for me, trusting in the disappointment, in the pain, the hardship. Trusting in divine timing. When I chose this word at the end of 2018, I remember ending the year thinking, “mmm I didn’t quite finish with trust this year.” So I chose it again as we rounded the corner to 2020. And now, as I sit in the colder weather, feeling December 2020 wrap me in a cozy blanket, I feel the depth of trust I built this year. This year trust became a mantra. It became a guiding light. It became an inner knowing. Sometimes sitting in trust, believing, praying, feeling it. Sometimes taking action towards my trust. Sometimes so stuck in my head I had to remember to even  pull out my word.

Overtime, I began to feel my relationship with trust grow, and today, I can feel trust in my body in the deepest way I’ve ever known. I felt my own trust resilience flourish beyond a layer of healing I could never have described before this moment.

What I want to say about this is keep going. Keep trusting in your path. Keep playing with trust as your mantra. You can choose trust as your word of the year again for 2021. Choose whatever feels good to you.  In some ways I think I’ve had trust as my mantra for the last ½ a decade. It’s not about how long it takes our bodies to learn our lessons, it’s about how we choose to show up when we are presented with our lessons. It’s about the little moments. The moment when something happens differently than you expected. The moment you’re disappointed. The moment you’re sad, angry, heartbroken. In these moments it’s about choosing that all of your emotions are allowed to be there, and you can still choose to hold trust. Your relationship with trust will waiver. That’s okay. It’s like any other relationship, you don’t have to be absolute all the time. Building trust resilience is like building muscle. It’s like changing a habit. It doesn’t happen overnight. And this is how all of healing works. It’s something you choose to do in each little moment, and over time you begin to see you’re healing.

Keep healing beautiful friends. You’re doing it. You’re changing. You’re building your trust resilience. And I love you.